Casey Anthony ... will you marry me?

Okay, okay, I know ... this seems a little surprising coming from a guy like me. However, I have always made rational decisions in my life and I see no reason to change things now.

Why am I proposing to Casey Anthony? I obviously have some well thought out reasons ...

1) She is a cutie! Let's face it -- we have all seen her "party girl" pictures. Even when they tried to downplay her looks in court, she still looked hot.

Yeah -- she has that Alanis Morisette vibe going on, but she is waaaay cuter. And her figure ... well ...

2) She has been in jail for about three years. Hmmm ... a party girl who has been doing without for three years. I imagine that she must have certain ...  needs ... And yes -- this confirms what I have said for years: men are pigs!

3) Why would an old coot like me think that he even has a chance? Well, we already know that there might be some funky daddy story here. I'd guess that it is just another of her many lies, but hey -- it means she might consider it.

4) Speaking of lies -- since she lies about everything, there would be no pretense of her ever telling the truth.

Casey: "Honey, I do not know where your poker bankroll went. It was right on the table this morning."

L36: "Ahhh ... my girl!"

5) Discipline. Two of my teenage kids can get awfully mouthy with their parents. Imagine if they had to think about real consequences for their actions.

6) She is a problem solver. For example, a big problem I have in this whole plan is that I am married. However, Casey seems to have a way of making problems just disappear ... at least for awhile.

Well, I figure this is worth a shot. If I hear any good news I will update this post. Otherwise, if you see me on Anderson Cooper or Greta ... BOOM!