Unofficial Las Vegas Hookers Week
The purpose of this week, if I might be so bold to suggest, is to "honor" the ladies of the night of Sin City. Well, maybe not so much honor, but to at least acknowledge the people who are as much a part of our Las Vegas experience as the porn slappers who line the Strip we love so dearly.
First, let me start by saying that I do not have any great stories of actually patronizing any Las Vegas hookers. As this guy will tell you, I am a Midwesterner. We are known for our common sense values, friendliness, and steadfastness. I have been married for over twenty years. I take my marriage vows seriously. 'nough said. But ... that doesn't mean that I don't know what goes on around me.
I lost count of the number of sojourns I have made to Las Vegas some time ago. I would estimate maybe 75-100 trips? For several years, I would have been hard pressed to know that hookers even existed in Las Vegas. Was it that I was so innocent ... or was it that my brother and I hung out on the north side of the strip in the el cheapo places? During the early years many nights were spent at Circus-Circus -- one of the low rollers dream spots. Cheap hotel, cheap eats, but tons of kiddies and families. It would not exactly be a great place for business for a lady of the night, I imagine. Other times we stayed and hung out at Westward Ho. If you had ever been in the Ho before, you realize that we were really pushing the limit there. If you weren't at least 60 years old you didn't fit in at the Ho. Certainly that place would not be hookers' paradise.
Later we moved toward the center of the Strip, the place where we feel most comfortable today. Bingo -- hookerland! Now we know that any late night spent on the strip will tend to bring you at least a few invitations if you so much as even look at the hookers. Some of the usual-type comments:
Upon seeing a rather attractive group of three hookers, led by an attractive blond, I perhaps looked a little too long, which resulted in:
hooker: "I'd sure like to make your night."
Hmmm ... there were three ... hmmm ...
After a long poker session after the economy turned bad, the hookers in and near the Imperial Palace were getting really aggressive.
hooker: "Hey baby, where ya going"
light: "To my room." (big mistake to say this)
hooker: "Take me with you, baby."
light -- swatting the woman's hands off me: "Going to SLEEP."
Most of the time I try to give the "definitely not interested" vibe when I am in hookerland, but a guy walking solo down the strip at 4:00 a.m. seems to give off maybe a "pathetic" vibe instead.
The hookers are not hard to spot. Look for the women who look like they are advertising their wares, and bingo -- you betcha! Of course, if you go past a club like Drai's late at night, the women who appear to wear clothing best described as tight and minimal are the young partiers who might have a future in the world's oldest profession -- but not just yet.
So ... now it is time to do your part to promote this week. Post a comment here. Post your own hooker story in your blog. Let the good times roll!