A Fatherly Day
The male population in my house has greatly decreased with my son moving out and with the loss of our cat, Boyfriend. Now it is just me and the chinchillas. In fact, Gravy, the first chinchilla, was purchased and brought home five years ago today.
Now ... you might be wondering how I know that Gravy was brought into the family five years ago today. The answer is that I was searching previous posts I had written about my Dad, who passed away nine years ago today.
On that anniversary five years ago, I wrote the following:
It is now four years since my father passed away. It still seems like just a few months ago that he was around. Although I don't like to dwell on the negative things from the past, I am still haunted, to some degree, by being there when the life support systems were turned off and watching him die. It is such an unbelievably horrible feeling and an experience I can't possibly describe. God knows how people are able to handle situations ten times worse, like watching a loved one be the victim of a violent crime. Dad, the White Sox pasted the A's today, so I know you are happy.
The years have certainly helped to heal the pain. Like most people who have lost a parent or parents, sometimes it is hard to believe how many years have passed since a loved one has been gone.
Around the anniversary of his death, I have focused on stories from the past, usually ones with some humor or ones that reviewed some special thing he had done. This year the thing that comes to mind is the difficult time we had dealing with my Mom when she suffered one of her severe bouts of depression. I was in college, busier than hell with classes, work and involvement in a service organization, when I took off from school and went home to assist with my mother. It was so scary seeing her that way. My Dad, who wasn't exactly Mr. Sensitivity, did one heck of a job with her -- keeping her calm, getting her to the hospital ... I know that he appreciated having me come home so that he didn't have to do everything alone. Just two guys sucking it up and dealing with a difficult situation.
And oh yeah -- the White Sox, who have been really terrible this season, won tonight. It brought a wistful smile to my face.