The Cast Party
My wife has been in a play in town and tonight was the night of the cast party. Faithful husband that I am, I told her that I would accompany her although, only knowing one person who would be there, I had a feeling it was not going to be the highlight of my week.
I asked my wife to pick me up after the play was over. Much to my surprise, I went downstairs only to find the daughter of She Hate Me in my house! Wonderful -- the klutzy daughter of the woman who hates my guts for no reason is now tagging along for a ride. Hmmm .. should I make small talk? "How is you biotch mother?" I thought. Baaaaaaaa.
Of course, a theatre cast party oftentimes means lot of talk about stuff I normally would not ponder. For example, would it be more difficult to put a dog in a bathtub full of water or for a guy to put his nuts up another guy's bunghole? Why did one of the play's divas drop her pants after a play? "I had underwear on," she said. Someone than mentioned "Yeah -- but it was see-through."
Unfortunately, the food at the party was all junk food, which I have been avoiding like the plague for the past seven weeks. Dang.
After being a good sport and enjoying the conversation for over an hour, I felt like it was time to go. My wife had assured me that we would be driving home ALONE. But of course, guess who tagged along for a ride home although she only lives a few blocks away? Fauck. If only I had a bomb or two in my car the night might have had a great ending. Dang.
I asked my wife to pick me up after the play was over. Much to my surprise, I went downstairs only to find the daughter of She Hate Me in my house! Wonderful -- the klutzy daughter of the woman who hates my guts for no reason is now tagging along for a ride. Hmmm .. should I make small talk? "How is you biotch mother?" I thought. Baaaaaaaa.
Of course, a theatre cast party oftentimes means lot of talk about stuff I normally would not ponder. For example, would it be more difficult to put a dog in a bathtub full of water or for a guy to put his nuts up another guy's bunghole? Why did one of the play's divas drop her pants after a play? "I had underwear on," she said. Someone than mentioned "Yeah -- but it was see-through."
Unfortunately, the food at the party was all junk food, which I have been avoiding like the plague for the past seven weeks. Dang.
After being a good sport and enjoying the conversation for over an hour, I felt like it was time to go. My wife had assured me that we would be driving home ALONE. But of course, guess who tagged along for a ride home although she only lives a few blocks away? Fauck. If only I had a bomb or two in my car the night might have had a great ending. Dang.
posted by lightning36 at 11:56 PM
4 Comments:
I had a funny response all typed up but then I realized that no comment that uses the word "anus" four times and some variant of the word "nutsack" three times is ever as funny as one thinks.
Your blog is starting to suffer from the Boston Diva Syndrome. Unfortunately, the associated luck failed to materialize.
Better luck next time.
The stage lights never go out for some, eh?
BTW, no LV in Dec for me.
Just how klutzy is she?
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